My Mothers Rhubarb

What did you wake up to today?

When I wrote this it was a Sunday morning, there was a mist outside my window, a buddleia bush, rolling fields, trees, the sound of birds and the occasional Sunday driver.

The day before had been sunny most of the day, I had hung washing on a new line strung across the garden and planted sunflower seeds in the earth, scattered with used coffee compost from the local cafe.

And each morning for the past week I had had my Mum's Rhubarb for breakfast.

And why am I telling you this? 

Because these things are an insight into why I moved country after 12 years in a Mediterranean, 300-days-of-sunshine-a-year, idyll.

Roots and The Land, my love.

The Longing

For the past 2 or 3 years I have felt a yearning, a longing.

Deep in my system things felt off, like a jigsaw piece was missing or the lid of the jar wasn't screwed on properly.

It took time to really discern what it was.

To separate out the threads and see which ones were just patterns of running, greener grass syndrome, the desire to be protected.

To really really listen and then to act on what came through.

The Clarity

And it became very very clear - that I need to be here

 With my family

and

 On the land I was born to.

Hands in the soil, breathing the same air, no longer with the salt water dividing us or flight schedules to navigate.

The Knowing

And how do I know?

Because my body knows.

I feel a solidity and strength. 

A yes-ness. 

My spine feels different. My skin. 

Sure, some of that is because I am somewhere familiar, my body knows this land, this air, this mist, these fields.

But there is a level beyond, a clicking into place, the jigsaw piece, the lid on the jar. A dropping IN.

And the perfect encapsulation of that is my Mum's Rhubarb.

Grown on the land, by her earthy hands and taken into my body like sacrament.

Divine

It also didn't escape my attention that a week after I moved, this land crowned a now monarch, it seems earth loving Charles and I started our chapters together.

So how about you ?

What are you surrounded by this morning and what does that show you about what you have chosen in this life?

Drop me an email me with your thoughts, I would love to hear from you… x

Thanks to Heather Barnes on Unsplash for image

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